Middle of the Day Mommy Dates

In the movie White Christmas, Danny Kaye's character tells Bing Crosby's character something to the effect of 'Get yourself happily married and have nine kids. If you spend just five minutes a day with each of those kids, then that's 45 minutes I get all to myself!'

In case you've lost count, we have five children. You would think that I could find five minutes a day for each child to stop and look into their eyes and listen to them.

You'd think.

It's hard to do things one on one with our kids. We call it the Me Too Syndrome. If one child gets special attention in anyway, there's at least one other child two steps behind me or Joshua saying 'me too, Mommy/Daddy!'

Personally, I find that since I am home with them all day long, reading books, making meals, teaching, training, disciplining and all the other stuff that comes with being a stay at home/homeschooling Mama, I just want some me time. I don't want to spend every evening out with somebody after a full day of Mommy-ing.

Frankly, I just want to spend some time with my husband. I want to decompress. I want to prop up my feet and veg out.

I struggled for a while with what to do, trying to give every kid some personal attention everyday. The fact is, I can't do it. Not in this season of life. The physical needs of our family as a whole prevent me from scheduling out 3 hours a day to give each child one on one time.

What I can do is pay attention to them and try to keep their little love tanks filled.

Elizabeth just needs to be close. She is happy to help me with whatever I am doing or cuddle next to me while I feed the baby or use the computer.

Thomas needs praise. He wants to show off his latest dragon slaying and get proper credit for it. He loves to tell me in detail how he solved a problem or defeated a particularly hard level in some DS game and beams like the sun when I applaud his work.

Anna wants to relate. She demands conversation and look-me-in-the-eye attention. A simple nod of the head is not an answer in Anna-Land. She needs words and conversation.

Sarah Grace wants it all. She's not demanding, but to really fill her love tank, she needs conversation, one on one and away from anything that might distract your attention from her.

Daniel needs diaper changes and entertainment and to be stopped from eating electric cords and distracted from tipping trash cans and to be trained to heed "no" and to be fed and to be put down for nap and to be pointed in a different direction than the steps and... Well, as a ten month old he obviously has different needs than the others!

I've discovered a super-duper way to give each of my children a Mommy Date. Every single week. On Monday, it's Thomas, Tuesdays are Sarah Grace's, Wednesdays are for Elizabeth, and Thursdays are all about Anna.

When Daniel goes down for his morning nap, I take my 'date' to my room and we spend at least half an hour just hanging out. We read, we chat, we play DS together, we play dress up, we sing songs, we cuddle close, we share a special snack. Whatever. The child gets to choose. Anna's favorite thing to do is jump on my bed and sing songs to me while I watch her and listen to her. So I do. I just sit and smile and laugh and she's fulfilled!

I know that as the kids grow, these little meetings will be more precious and that they will change in content. But I love having this time that we both know is about just us. We still have a monthly date with each kid, but this allows me to keep better fellowship with them in the in-betweens.

Do you have dates with your kids? How do you fit them in?

Well...Welcome Home?

In a large family, few things can make a Mama quiver like the dreaded stomach virus. Y'all, I am quivering.

I returned from a wonderful weekend at Blissdom yesterday and slowly began collecting my chicks from the sweet people who were keeping them. Joshua arrived from his weekend away around 7 and we went to gather the girls. Finally, about eight last night, we were all together. It made me a very happy Mama.

We all chattered, eager to share our adventures. And then we fell into bed about 10:30.

At 3 AM, Thomas walked into our room. "I threw up."

We laid there in disbelief for a few seconds before we got up to deal with things.

So far, he's the only one down. But when kids will share nothing else, they can be counted on for sharing sickness.

At least we're all together. Quiver though I may, I'm glad to have everyone under one roof again.

Why Ducks And Frogs Are Funny At Our House

When I was a little girl, my grandmother took issue with the phrases 'pee-pee' and 'poopy'. At a young age, she began giving code phrases for our pottying needs. There were several that simply never took, which we can all be thankful for because a few that I remember were utterly ridiculous. One, however, stuck. When we needed to go poop we were supposed to tell her that 'we stepped on a duck'. For whatever reason, my sisters and I twigged to that funny phrase and I can't tell you how happy it made our grandmother. Even better, the entire family still uses this phrase.

But we warped it to suit our own twisty senses of humor. At our house, if you hear someone say something about stepping on a duck, you can be sure that a stink will assault you soon and that gas was passed. Our Anna has her own spin. She will tell you she didn't step on a duck... she stepped on a 'fwog!' And we laugh every single time. Because there is no shortage of juvenile humor in our house.

Now, my Thomas, my sweet, kind, friendly, wonderful Thomas... well, he delights in the fine art of stepping on ducks. He is a true boy and each and every time he toots, he slyly looks around to see who the first victim will be.

And occasionally, he aims.

He walked over to me with a look of sweet innocence, sat down next to me, cuddled in close and hugged me while telling me he loved me. And then he jumped up and walked away. While I was pondering how much longer I would have to enjoy these impulsive displays of affection before he deemed himself to macho, I noticed the stink.

"Thomas!" I cried.

He was standing on the far side of the room when his peal of laughter rang out and he took off running around sharing his accomplishment.

Encouraging My Reluctant Learner

Months ago, Thomas and I were discussing his reluctance to do his school work. His disdain for all things school related had come to a head and there were issues to be dealt with. We chatted for several minutes before he sighed one of his heartfelt but highly exaggerated sighs and looked at me as if he were about to impart the very longings of his soul.

"Mom, I just feel as if God made me to play all day."

Well.

Actually, I think if we really stripped it down and got back to the basics, God probably didn't design us to do workbook pages and sentence diagramming and memorizing the table of elements. I laughed as I explained all of this to Thomas and then reminded him that Noah built an ark. It takes smarts to do that. Even if God handed off the blueprint, Noah had to read it and follow directions.

Thomas giggled and grimaced and tried his best to look glum about the whole thing. But he got what I was saying.

I heard what he was saying, too. You see, Thomas has a bit of a hard road. He's a boy. In a house full of girls, he's a boy. A bouncing, energetic, make a mess, live out loud, get into it, needs an adventure, wants to do it all, boy. Yes, he has a brother now, but Daniel hardly counts in this scenario, given his less-than-ten-months-outside-the-womb life. And my girls? They are the quiet and self-entertaining types. I say school and they cheer. I say go play, and they dash upstairs to their dress-up clothes and baby dolls.

So. I had some thinking to do. Thinking to create ways to slip in school work for my reluctant learner. I turned to homeschooling mothers of boys for advice. One mom (six boys ages 5-14!) and she told me to get the kid moving! For math facts, I will call out an equation and he will answer with jumping jacks or push ups or jumps or karate chops. (He counts out loud as he does nine jumping jacks to answer the equation 18-9=?) It takes a bit more time, but he LOVES it!

Thomas detests writing. He does his daily handwriting assignment without complaint (mostly due to the fact that complaining about it will have him writing ridiculously long and totally useless sentences), but rather than have him do other writing 'assignments' I have given him a journal with the only stipulation that it's for writing and if he draws a picture, he has to write about the picture explaining it. It will be a long time before he fills it up. Possibly another year or so, but occasionally he wants to jot something down or draw out a wood-working project he has in his head.

I also take dictation. I want Thomas to practice the art of spinning a story, but if having to write it out is what is stunting this exercise, then I don't mind being his secretary. It's actually pretty fun for both of us! Soon, he will take an 'official' typing/keyboarding class so he can type his stories on the computer rather then write them on paper.

Thomas loves all things science, so I tend to pick up all manner of science-y and nature books for him. He's not a big reader, although he has markedly improved over the last year, but he will pick up these kinds of books and inhale them. He reading comprehension is highly questionable, but I remind myself that he has plenty of time to grow there. For now, he's picking up books and reading them of his own volition. I also read with him a lot. He reads a page and I read a page. If he gets carried away and reads several in a row, I keep my mouth shut!

One of the beauties of homeschooling is the ability to tailor the presentation of knowledge to fit the needs and interests of the child. I occasionally worry about my kids in one area or another but I calmly remind myself of the advice of those who have gone before me: 'Create the opportunities for children to learn. They will pick it up in their own time.' and 'Read. Read, read, read. Read to them all the time.'

I'm still taking notes and trying new things. I'd love to hear your experiences and advice!!! Pretty please?

Obedience Can Be Scary, But It Is So Worth It

Fifteen years ago, the car I was in was pulled over on the side of the road, the radio was turned off, and all eyes were on me as I tearfully and joyously prayed because I finally recognized the power of the Cross and accepted Christ as my Savior. A few short months later, I dipped my toes in the water for a split second before I stepped in and walked down the baptismal steps.

Three days ago, I watched as my sweet Sarah Grace timidly walked down those very same steps. I watched as Pastor Scott, the same pastor who baptized me fifteen years ago, married me 8 years ago, and has prayed over each wonderful addition to our family, reached out to steady her as made she her way down the baptismal steps.

She had counted down the weeks, the days, and even the hours until her baptism. There is no excitement like the excitement of our Sarah Grace when she is looking forward to something big. Her desire to obey God and be baptized was sincere, but folks, she was so afraid of stepping out in front of her entire family and our church. She clutched at me and hid her face, but in the end, she did what she was there to do. And the face-splitting grin that broke across her face as she left the baptistry will be forever in my heart.

Photo Courtesy of Life's Mirror Images

A Sacrifice of Praise

Somewhere around mid-October, I ran several sheets of card stock through the Cricut and wound up with a few hundred leaves. While Joshua and I watched a movie one night, I punched holes in them and ran a short string through the end of each leaf so they would be hang-able. Then we dropped them into a pretty crystal dish along with a Sharpie and after we finished our meal each night, we would go around the table and ask each child to tell us something they were thankful for. I wrote each blessing on a leaf and after dinner, we'd each hang up our leaf. We call it the 'Thankful Tree' but we like saying the 'Thankful-leaves' which comes out sounding like 'Thankfullies'.

We continued on in this fashion until sometime in December. And then I just left the tree in the corner of the dining room because it was very charming with it's sweet leaves full of gifts.

I wrapped classy white duct tape around the stems of two
branches and a brick to get the super-twiggy effect I wanted.

I dropped the ugly white duct-taped brick into an ancient paint
can and tucked burlap around it all to make it look prettier.

A shot of the tree in 'bloom'.

Sometime in January, I decided it was time to take our tree down. I pondered what to do with it. I hated to throw it out, but I am trying to train myself to be more streamlined and a little less clingy for sentimental reasons.

But those leaves! Full of hope and praise!

Joshua suggested we break up the tree and use both it and the leaves in our next fire. The kids and I all loved the idea of offering up our Thankfullies to God.

The branches of our tree as tinder for our fire.

Our leaves scattered across.

...let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise... ~~ Hebrews 13:15

I Iz Helping

With age comes responsibility.

You've heard that one, right? Let me just preface the following post with the fact that I have a house full of mostly very willing helpers.

When Thomas helped with lunch one day last week...


When Elizabeth helped unstack the dishes...


When Daniel helped unstack the dishes... or something.


In defense of my sweet children, these accidents are abnormal. Generally the worst is a spoon in the wrong slot in the silverware drawer. This was just a weird and particularly rough day. We dealt with things as best we could and no one shed any tears.

Except Daniel when I took him off the dishwasher door.

Daniel - 9 Months

Today, I am 9 months old. All I really know about this is, well, I get more crackers. But my Mommy thinks this is a pretty big milestone: I've been growing outside her belly as long as I grew inside her belly.

Silly Mommy.

But today, I am 9 months and...
...I am crawling all over the lower level of the house.
...I have begun to get curious about those steps. Nobody lets me get past the first step, though.
...I love sitting in the bath tub, dipping my head down and drinking from the water.
...I am pulling up on things.
...I fall down a lot when I pull up on things.
...I will gnaw on ANYTHING that I can fit into my mouth. Mommy calls me Beaver because I love woodchips.
...I am an amazing eater. You have never seen a mouth open as wide as mine does when there is a spoon in my general vicinity.
...I respond to my name!