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Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Moment Blessings

"Anna?" I called.

"What, Mommy?" came her sweet reply.

"I need some love from you. Can you come give me hugs?"

"Well, I'm busy wif my dollhouse wight now. Maybe way-ter."

I giggled. Then I ran across the room, scooped her up and showered her little face with kisses while hugging her close.

"Mom! I can't deal wif dat wight now! I needa go pway!"

But she grinned when I asked for just one little kisser, wrapped her arms around my neck, and planted a sweet, sloppy, two-year-old style kiss on my face.

It's these little moments that make me love my job and energize me to keep doing it. In all the crazy that happens in our daily routines, there are seconds of sweetness that bless my Mama heart.

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Photo Ops

The kids love to use their mad camera skills these days. And in all honesty, I just told them to take pictures of their family this week, so I have no idea who took what pictures. I guess it's pretty safe to assume that the face in the picture is not the person who took the picture. That's the best I can do!




This one was supposed to be of Joshua and I but somehow the photographer managed to cut me out. Zoom is still a mystery to them!





Thursday, August 25, 2011

Finding The Friendly In Our Family

Every mother dreams of her children being best friends. Annnnd... every mother bangs her head on a wall when she hears her lovely off-spring screaming at one another over whose turn it is to lick the mixing spoon or pick a movie to watch. It's been this way for centuries.

Well, maybe they used to argue over whose turn it was to hoop roll.

One of the things I've learned in my short stint as a mother is that the happy, smiling children scenario is not the scene for every moment of the day. It boils down to selfishness and a sin nature. Now there's something you don't have to teach them. It's just a by-product of breathing.

At some point, it occurred to me that while I couldn't totally oust the sibling rivalry, I could do things to encourage companionship amongst my youngsters. There are ways to help children cooperate and cheer each other on. To do this, though, you have to be intentional. You can't just say, 'Hey you guys, start loving each other the way Christ wants you to and quit being monkey-butts!"

Or you know, however you would relay that particular idea in your family. We like the phrase 'monkey-butt', despite how not very far it goes in our quest of lady-like girls and gentlemanly boys.

With that in mind, there are several little things that I have incorporated into our days. Board games are a necessary part of our school week. Candyland, Chutes & Ladders, Bingo, Hi-Ho Cherry O!, Racko, Sorry, Trouble, Uno, and Hungry Hungry Hippos are some of our favorites.

These games challenge them to more than just learn strategy. They learn honesty and integrity (don't change the rules to suit your situation). They learn to take a loss with grace (okay, so they aren't always graceful, but it's about progress, not perfection). They learn not to gloat when they are ahead or when they win (amazingly, they are pretty good at this part). They encourage one another. And they cooperate. Usually.

Another area that I have had to let loose the reigns a bit is with my girls. They are girls, they like to do girlie things. Even when I want to shout a great big fat "NO!" I am learning to graciously say "Sure, that sounds like fun!"

Like today when Elizabeth wanted to paint her toenails. What I saw was hot pink nail polish on my furniture, walls, and floor. What she saw was feminine, fun toes like Mommy. I suggested that she and Sarah Grace take turns and paint each others toes. Then I threw down a towel and had Elizabeth strip down to her underwear so as to save her pretty dress from irremovable stains. Cause I can only loosen up so much.

Once the nails were all dry, the girls brushed each others hair until is was soft and shiny. And then they chased me down and begged to be allowed to put make up on. We have blue eye-shadow especially for ballet recitals and our church's Fall Festival. I chanted to myself to "be calm and carry on" as I handed over the compact of blue. They diligently sat down and made over their eyes.


There has yet to be a disagreement that escalates into a full blown argument between those two today. I won't say that this was the golden ticket of peace, but it certainly didn't hurt to be aiding them in their development of loving, sisterly bonds.

One of our favorite tricks (and oh yes, this is a trick) is the Peace Prize. Several weeks ago, I was nearing the end of my rope and lecturing the kids for the umpteenth time that day about promoting peace and not stirring up strife. Out of my mouth came the phrase, "At the end of the week, I will pick the person who has promoted the most peace for my Peace Prize".

I hadn't thought about this at all. It just tumbled out. It's been the best idea in ages. I don't pick a winner every week, and I don't always tell them I am on the look out for a winner. And the prizes are good. Ice cream dates, miniature golf dates, helping Mommy bake their choice of sweet treats, a purchase from the craft store, an extra movie selection at the library. Groupon and Living Social are great places to snag cheap passes for things to use as rewards.

These are just a few things we do to try to keep the peace in a house full of little people. I know that we will have to stay on our toes and make changes to our Parenting Plots to Promote Peace, but this is where we are today. I would love to hear what you do in your family to encourage friendship between your kidlets.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Tough Decisions

Recently, the subject of Thomas' education came up. As many of you know, we home school. It is a decision that makes me choke a little bit at the beginning of each school year... can I handle all the demands of all my little people, the schooling of my older little people, the character training, the upkeep of our home, the juggling of schedules, the cooking, the laundry, the errands, etc.

And more importantly, can I do it while maintaining a peaceful home? While being nice to my children and not growling around every other minute.

I won't lie. It's a difficult balance. I fall off the tight rope regularly and need to ask my childrens' forgiveness frequently.

I panicked ugly-big this year. With a seven year old and a six year old in the house competing for top dog, things get sticky. Their interests are diverging more and more every day and it's hard when two people don't evolve together, especially when they have been playmates for their entire lives. We won't even start on how vastly different their little personalities are and the conflicts that arise because of that.

Plus a four year old who begs to do school. And a two year old who is potty trained but still needs a Bathroom Monitor and spends most of her mornings clinging to me. Then there is the baby, who's needs are many and independencies are non-existent.

While far from under socialized, the fact is our children don't leave the family unit very often. We are in each others business all day, every day. This kind of life style might have worked better when there were cows to milk and chickens to feed and fields to plow and quilts to make and bread to bake and food to can and a list that goes on and on and on. Facts are facts: Life is easier in many ways than the 'good ol' days' and all, but idle hands are the devil's playground.

It takes careful planning to orchestrate the day of a family like ours. I can't even begin to tell you how daunting it is, how easy it is to fall into the trap of feeling like a failure, and how very alone I feel some days surrounded by nothing but the noise and the squeals and accomplishments and the tale-bearing and the joy and the whines of all my beloved little children.

All of the sudden, I was overwhelmed with it all. All I could come up with was to ship Thomas off to school for seven hours a day, leaving me with just the girls and Daniel. Joshua and I talked and prayed. I agonized and he supported me, because when push comes to shove, he leaves the house to support our material needs as a family and I am here with the children all day. The man is a saint in all the many ways he backs me up and all the extras he takes on, but he still has to leave the house eight hours a day. I asked for prayer from sweet heart-friends. I spoke at length with ladies who are hoeing the same row and ladies who have already harvested from similar rows.

In the end, I couldn't send him off. I didn't feel that God had released me of this responsibility He's given me: to train up my child in every area.

It is already shaping up to be a really tough year, but His mercies are new every morning. And though I know the road will be more challenging, I also have peace. The peace that comes with obedience. Next year will come, and we will re-evaluate the needs of our family then. As one of those wise ladies whose row is nearly completed said, "Nothing's permanent."

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Scenes From Last Week

One of the things we've started doing with Sarah Grace and Thomas is to allow them to take a few pictures each week. They are allowed to take shots of anything they see that interests them. The subjects of their pictures scream to the heavens and back the differences in boys and girls.



Thomas opted to capture a machine while Sarah Grace went with pretty flowers. Does it get any more straightforward than that?

Thomas takes great pride in being a brother to a brother. He takes amazing care of Daniel. In the mornings when Daniel wakes up, Thomas takes him out of the crib in the room the boys share, lays him on the floor and entertains him until I come to get everyone up. On this particular day, Thomas built a pyramid for Daniel. He thought Daniel loved it so much that he asked to take a picture of it so Daniel could remember it one day.



I lost Anna one day last week. It was quiet time and I had sent the kids upstairs to their respective quiet time spots. After I got Daniel settled in, I went upstairs to insure that Thomas and Sarah Grace had quiet activities and then tuck in Elizabeth and Anna for their naps. Except when I went to the guest room to check on Anna, but I didn't see her. I went back in the other bedrooms and asked the kids if Anna was in the room with them. I checked the bathrooms and then went downstairs to check the bathroom. I couldn't find her. I walked around outside but, again, still didn't see her. My heart began to accelerate as my mind started conjuring horrible thoughts. I breathed out a quick prayer and ran back inside to check more thoroughly. Back in the guest room, I looked in the closets and around the other side of the bed. This is what I saw:



She had curled up on the floor for some reason and fallen asleep quickly, explaining why she didn't answer my calls. I snapped a picture of her, tossed a blanket over her and let her be. She slept for three solid hours that day!

Over the weekend, we had a swim party to celebrate the August birthdays of Thomas, Sarah Grace, and their friend Micah. There was much tossing of children into the air and belly flopping and toddlers on the steps. I think it was the best party we've ever done. Bring kids in swimsuits, grab pizza and grapes, finish with cupcakes, clean up, kids pass out from sheer exhaustion after swimming all evening. Perfection in my book!





Yup, life is good.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Have You Ever Heard A Building Sigh With Relief?

Because I think that the actual cement bricks blew out the breath we didn't know they could hold when the door closed behind our exiting family today.

It's Sunday. After church Joshua made the command decision to treat us all to 5 Guys, the kids absolute, hands-down, all time favorite place to eat. I'm pretty sure this was the first time we have ventured out to lunch as a family since Daniel joined our family nearly four months ago.

Suffice it to say, all of this craziness could have been simply that we were out of practice.

We arrived through the front doors of the restaurant at about 12:15. Ordering went well; I love that they give free drinks to the kids. It's the only time our kids ever get anything besides water.

Which could account for the craziness, too. All the sugar from the soda they drank. Or absorbed...

Sarah Grace and Elizabeth were sitting at a table for two. Joshua, Anna, Thomas and I were across the almost two foot aisle from them at a table for four. And Daniel, who was sleeping, was in his infant seat on the floor between the two tables. Got that visual down? Because it is important later on.

We got everyone's food set before them and commenced eating. Within seconds, Elizabeth spilled about a quarter of her cup of root beer in her lap. On her white dress. We blotted her lap dry and went on with things. I mean, really, what's a meal with five little people if you don't have at least one minor accident?

Just as I sat down after cleaning up Elizabeth, Anna squeaked out her needs.

"Mommy! I needa go to da poddy!"

So, yeah, I forgot to mention that she had told me this while we were in the van on the way to the restaurant. And I forgot about her needs in the midst of getting everyone corralled and into chairs so we could eat.

I jumped up and off we went to the bathroom. She did her best, I'm sure, but her undies were already wet and there was a small circle on the front of her dress from where she had been holding herself as we duck-walked to the bathroom. I did what I could to clean her up and rinse her off after she finished up with the potty.

We got settled back in at the table and Thomas started telling me that he needed softer food until his other tooth fell out. You need to know he lost one of his top front teeth yesterday and the other was very loose. He had no more than finished his request for a dietary change when he took a bite of his sandwich and the tooth in question flipped out of his mouth, rolled down the sandwich, and into his lap! We giggled and listened to him sweetly lisp his way through his excitement.

I looked over to see Sarah Grace and Elizabeth both with their pointer fingers on each hand topped in ketchup. They were playing finger people and their little ketchup-ed capped people were talking to each other. I reminded them of their status as ladies and they quickly licked their fingers clean. Because that's what ladies do when they find themselves with ketchup tipped fingers.

Eating resumed for two short minutes, Thomas still reliving his newest tooth loss, before the next round of crazy.

Before I could finish chewing a bite of burger, Elizabeth spilled the entire contents of her cup. Root beer in her lap, on her chair, on the floor, all over the table, and dripping towards the baby's car seat. Some lady I don't know picked up Daniel's car seat and moved it safely away from the dripping soda. Then the lady and one of her daughters continued to run back and forth with napkins, napkins, and more napkins until the mess was under control. I couldn't thank them enough for their random act of kindness.

Elizabeth, who'd immediately started crying when she spilled, regained her composure, the mess was cleaned up, and we all went back to eating. Except that Daniel had awakened during all the commotion. He happily sat in his seat and played until just before Joshua finished eating. Popping the last of his sandwich in his mouth and taking a quick trip to the bathroom to wash his hands, Joshua then took the baby and gave him his bottle while the rest of us tried desperately to finish our food.

Daniel downed the bottle and, true to form, did The Doo. Joshua looked up at me, grimaced, and held out his hand to show that Daniel had gone so heartily that he left a gift on the hand that was supporting his bottom. I got the giggles and told Thomas to go and fetch some napkins. Thomas wandered back a few moments later empty handed.

"I couldn't find them," he said, looking guilty.

I dashed off to get the napkins, but not before I really got the giggles as Joshua pointed to the floor. Daniel's diaper wasn't holding things in to well. There was a dollop of poop on the floor of the fine dining establishment.

Joshua handed the baby off to me while he mopped up the floor real quick. I dropped a handful of napkins in the car seat and settled Daniel in it so I could fish out a clean diaper. Joshua whisked off a handful of trash before he came back for Daniel so he could go change him. I was staying behind to clean up the leftovers of the meal and get the other kids ready to go out the door.

And then, then... 

...then a bag that had been sitting on the table collecting peanut hulls and uneaten french fries was knocked over. It's contents spilled all over Daniel and his car seat. Joshua and I looked at each other and exploded in laughter.

I was trying to reign it in as I bent down to start clearing the food from my baby and his seat when Joshua pulled out his phone and told me that perhaps this was God's way of telling me it was time to update the blog.


Yes, ladies and gentlemen, he took a picture of my poor, french fry covered baby. And then we quickly pulled ourselves together and left.

I'm pretty sure nobody misses us.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Birthday Money Math

It's August. Around these parts, we call it the Birthday Season. In the time span of about five weeks, we have Sarah Grace's birthday, Thomas' birthday, and my birthday. Plus my sister and my mother-in-law. Honestly, weight gain rivals Christmas.

The ten day time span in which I have two six year olds is particularly entertaining. Sarah Grace is nothing short of thrilled to be the same age as the brother she adores, and Thomas is nothing short of dismayed to not have number proof of his position as the oldest. Conversations can escalate into all out shouting matches as to which child wields the authority.

I just keep the Tylenol in my pocket. Yup.

With Birthday Season comes the influx of mail for the kids. Used to, everyone sent them musical cards. I haven't shed a tear to not see a single one of those this year. Now that the kids can read, relatives send nice, quiet cards. Usually with some kind of monetary donation to the kids Birthday Funds. We called it extra math lessons this year.

For Sarah Grace's birthday, one of her cards had a five dollar bill and a one dollar bill. The bills fluttered to the ground as she opened her card and an excited Sarah Grace squeal issued forth. She grabbed up the two bills as she read the card in excited tones then squeaked out that she had been sent two dollars! I tilted my head and told her to look closely.

'Oh! A five bill and a one bill! That's six, Mommy! Just like ME! That's six!!!'

By the time she finished her assessment, her voice was so high that I'm pretty sure dogs within close proximity to us were going a little berserk.

To my humor, Thomas did pretty much the same thing, minus the girly squealing. As he opened his card on his birthday, the money again fluttered down. He guffawed and grabbed the bills from his lap.

'Look, Gracie, I got three dollars!'

'Thomas, how much do you have?', I asked.

'Ooooh! I have seven dollars! Because I'm seven!'

Another incident that had me laughing was a gentleman who has essentially adopted the kids as his grandchildren. On Sarah's birthday, he handed her two five dollar bills. She was beside herself. She announced that evening that she had three five dollars and sixteen one dollars and a bunch of change. Now our Sarah is a saver. She will carefully preserve the large majority of her allowance and birthday money and then go and spend it lavishly on herself and her loved ones.

For Thomas' birthday, our adopted grandparent gave Thomas a ten dollar bill. Thomas told me later his excitement of the ten dollar bill. He was especially thrilled that Sarah didn't have one and elated, too, because it was his first ever ten dollar bill. Thomas is historically a spender. He can barely stand to have money in his pocket and not exchange it for some item or another. However, he recently counted out all his bills and his change and had almost enough to buy a new game for his DS. I can't tell you how proud he was of that purchase. It represented major period of savings on his part! So I'm curious to see how he handles himself with his birthday money and his allowance from here on out.


Monday, August 15, 2011

Thomas at 7

Hello 7!

Why does this seem like such a turning point age? In my head, this is a milestone birthday. It ranks right up there with five and fifteen and twelve and twenty-four.

I know, I have some random ones in there, but those are landmark ages. I don't know why. But fear not, I have shared those random genes with offspring numbering five now. You have decades of crazy to enjoy it, soak it in, revel.

Enough about me, yes? Look at this giant man-child!


Yes, he does tend toward the silly. It is his trademark. Sometimes it leaves us rolling our eyes. Other times it makes us smile. And frequently, very frequently, his antics have us laughing out loud, occasionally even when we are trying to be serious. The kid was born for drama and cameras and an audience. It's his happy place, I do believe.

Despite his request for a football cake (hello? did I ever pull some easy cake duty this year!!) he's not too terribly sports oriented. He likes buttons and wires and gadgets and hammers and nails and fresh wood.


Happy Birthday, Thomas! You are an awesome son and an amazing big brother to your sisters and Daniel! We love you so much!!

Monday, August 08, 2011

MIA Among Other Things

It's been a long few weeks. I find myself sitting down at the computer to record the days of our lives, but when my fingers touch the keys, I can't seem to string the words together in a way that justly defines the life that we are living.

No, nothing big or different from what we normally do, just...complex. In that way that raising a family is complex. In that way that homeschooling three children and keeping a toddler entertained and trying to roll with the schedule changes of a newborn is complex. In that way that life, glorious and blessed, is complex.

I'm finding the need to hold on to my little people stronger. The need to sit with them for a little bit longer on the couch, hug them a little closer, dance a little more, and tell them how thankful I am that the Lord loaned them to me.

In direct juxtaposition (don't you just love that word?), I have weird urges to get the house pristine clean, finish all my decorating projects, and sit at my sewing machine to churn out imperfect 'things'.

You'd think I was nesting. Like third-trimester-nesting.

Honestly though, I think its just that I've contracted some sort of weird mid-mid-life reckoning disease.

So until my fingers find a way to over-ride my brain and put words together, just look at pictures.


They're worth a thousand words, you know.

Friday, August 05, 2011

Sarah Grace is 6

Dear Sarah Grace,

I keep looking at you and wondering where the past six years have flown off to. I remember the red-faced bundle of you that was handed to me in the hospital. I remember your crazy hair that insisted on standing straight up for several months that first year. Your solemn little face, your need to put everything in a row.


2005

2006

You have always been a cheerful little girl, though you were a bit stingy with those lovely smiles the first couple of years. You've always been serious about whatever task you were given, through and meticulous. There were several giggles as you slowly toddled down the aisle at your Aunt Kim's wedding and very carefully dropped flower petals, one at at time, on either side of you.

2007

As you have grown, you have branched out and tried many different things. Gymnastics, soccer, and ballet are areas that you have very studiously put forth all your effort to master to the very best of your ability. Half-way is not an option in your life. From chores and school work to play and friendships, you are an all or nothing type of gal.

2008

Your beautiful smile and sweet giggles have become much more frequent in the past two years. Your sense of humor is keen, and your wit sharp. You put thought into your words rather than just spouting forth noise, and your Daddy and I are frequently amazed by how perceptive you are.

2009

2010

Your have a singular sense of style that either has me laughing or has me helping you rethink an outfit. Seldom do I fall between those ends of the spectrum. You love all things Girl, leaving me gasping for breath and wondering how I am ever going to keep pace with you.

But mostly, you just make me proud. Proud to be your Mama and humbled that the Lord saw fit to give you to us to raise up. Love you, sweet girl! Happy 6th Birthday!!!

2011